Food Buzz Badge

Friday, November 11, 2011

Cold Comfort

It's been a long week over here in Cucina49-land.  Not because of work, which is fine, or even the fact that I'm hardly home between work and rehearsal--I expect that. 

We were always meant to be at an awkward phase with the play, which opens two weeks from tonight.  The actors put down their scripts at the beginning of the week, which always leads to trainwrecks and uncertain acting.  We're going through that ugly duckling phase, which is worrisome but usually works itself out.

It's not even that I lost another actor last night, which I did.  It was the manner in which the actor exited, refusing to take direction or give his fellow actors his best work.  It was the actor yelling at me that this was not an enjoyable experience, leaving several of the actors and my inimitable stage manager wondering what they had done or if it was their fault.  It was the yelling at me that their emotional instability was being caused by the show.  It was the fact that this actor was a good friend and managed to make me feel a combustible combination of angry, deeply sad and worried, questioning my own abilities.

The fact that it wasn't either true or fair isn't much of a comfort. 
There are times that you have to be professional when you really want to be a mess.  A few weeks ago, before I started rehearsals, when I said that I didn't always want to be a leader--well, this is why.  Staying calm and reassuring the cast when I don't feel assured costs something.  Even with a good cast and a supportive husband and a fabulous stage manager, it's lonely to be in this position.

So, on this cold and snowy night, when I go to rehearsal to talk to the cast and crew and encourage us to move on, I am taking a big box of cupcakes from a place called Cake Studio.  It won't make everything better, but it's a start.

13 comments:

  1. I hope your week gets better now that its over... you have a new start and this is perfect with those cupcakes. I agree they make everything better!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The cupcakes are such a nice gesture...I hope things go better this coming week.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Good luck with the performance. You know, there is one in every crowd. Hang in there! (And the title of this post sound very Proustian to me.)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, I'm sorry to hear you had a bad week! I hope things get better this week!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dang, I'm sorry that you had a friend do that....it makes it that much harder! I'm sure when the curtain goes up, everything will work out - and it's really nice of you to take the cupcakes along. Let us know how it goes!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sorry to hear *hugs* I hope everything works itself out, and I am sure cupcakes are a very good tsart.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yuck. Having been in this position before as an actor, I can tell you that it's only going to get better now. Everyone can rally around the final push and it brings everyone together that much more. Not the funnest way for it to happen, but you get a very tight cast when all is said and done. And cupcakes make most things better :) Can't wait to come and see it!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Cupcakes make everything better. Hope everything works out with the play!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh, I'm sorry to hear you had a bad week! I hope things better this week! cup cake is nice.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hi, hope everything will get fine soon and nice cakes will make some changes, take care.

    ReplyDelete
  11. oh no! I hope you're feeling better now!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sorry to hear you had a hard week. Hope everything went well with the cupcake and you are having a good week so far... By the way they have great desserts here!

    ReplyDelete
  13. For the record, cupcakes do make for excellent peacemaking tools. Your instincts were right on.

    ReplyDelete